By: Desmonae Flowers
Superwoman is not just a myth she is the embodiment of Ch-Hara J. Pearson. Ch-Hara J Pearson is a native of Jersey City, NJ currently residing in Fayetteville, NC. She’s a wife, mother of four, a graduate of North Carolina Central University, Certified Credit Repair Specialist & Owner of NuEra Credit Solutions LLC and Customer Service Advocate at Blue Cross NC. With all of life’s responsibilities, her passion is bringing awareness and helping others through her non-profit organization S.C.A.R.S. Inc. (Survivors Connecting And Restoring Self). Her love to connect with others and especially empower women has lead her to accept the Presidency of ACHI Women Supporting Women Fayetteville Chapter.
As a generational survivor of Domestic Violence and Sexual Abuse, her life mission is to make sure survivors have accessibility to the treatment, counseling, and care to heal from their trauma. At a young age, she witnessed abuse but was never allowed to speak out about it. In July 2011, Ch-Hara had her final straw, her significant other decided to point a gun to her head and pull the trigger, she promised herself if she made it out alive she would never look back.
She didn’t want her kids to think this was love and realized she had to love herself first. Her kids seeing her in a casket at the age of 5 and 4 was enough for her to walk away, move out of Raleigh and start over. Ch-Hara made the decision that the cycle had to end with her not only for her but her kids, they needed love and support if this ever happened to them, and the confidence to speak out.
After being a victim of domestic violence, seeking help was not an easy feat, those whom she had contacted had never been through abuse and lacked knowledge, empathy, and understanding. S.C.A.R.S. is an organization that offers mentoring, educational seminars, emergency shelter and “love” packages which contain everyday essentials for men, women, and children.
Most victims leave with nothing but the clothes they have on their back, the “love” packages consist of toothpaste, gift cards, deodorant, sanitary napkins, diapers, wipes and other essentials many take for granted. Once an individual is connected with S.C.A.R.S., they not only receive emergency services but they are connected with counselors, permanent housing resources, jobs, and credit repair. Ch-Hara not only has high hopes for S.C.A.R.S. but is dedicated to those that come through her door, and their healing and understanding that what happened to them does not define them or the rest of their lives.
I was able to snag a little of Ch-Hara’s time to ask her questions about S.C.A.R.S. and her journey getting here:
What inspired you to start your S.C.A.R.S. non-profit? Most survivors just try to get through the trauma. I felt like when I did read out for help those that tried to help me hadn’t went through abuse so their sensitivity to it was lacking and saddening at the same time. As a generational survivor a lot was witnessed but never an outlet to speak out. I felt the cycle had to end with me to allow my kids to know they can come to me if this was to ever happen, show them what real love is and speak out at all cost.
With so many organizations and responsibilities, how do you keep a good work-home balance? I’ve learned the hard way self-care is mandatory. Also shutting down and making time for your family. It’s no good to help outside the home when your own is in shambles.
How did you get through your domestic violence situation? What kept you going?July 2011 when he decided to point the gun to my head and pull the trigger I promised myself if I made it out alive I would never look back. I didn’t want my kids to think this was love and realized I had to love myself first. My kids sewing me in a casket at the age of 5 and 4 was enough for me to walk away, move out of Raleigh and start over.
Did you ever think when you started your journey with S.C.A.R.S. that you couldn’t do it or did you have setbacks? I was scared to start it not knowing I was doing the work anyway. I unknowingly was advocating and helping others transition from trauma to triumph. There were several financial and medical roadblocks, as I battle with endometriosis and adenomyosis daily. Some days I can hardly walk and I’m in constant pain, but the passion pushes me to do what I can within my means. When I wanted to give up there would always be a call, positive word, or situation that reminded me why I started.
Would you advise all victims of domestic violence to get counseling? I would definitely recommend they at least try it. It took me five tries before finding my current therapist. Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) is the avenue I went to. Some of my survivor sisters have done meditation, support groups, and so much more. Everyone’s different so I would say don’t limit yourself to just one try and see where your heart leads you.
What do you hope will be the outcome of S.C.A.R.S.? Do you have a specific amount of people that you want to help per year? I pray to open up a transitional home for both men and women by 2025. My first focus will be on boys because they are forgotten when it comes to abuse. I want to break the stigma abuse is a “girl” thing and provide these young men who will become someone’s father or husband with the resources needed to live a prosperous life.
What advice would you give to other advocates that want to help in such matters that people go through every day but don’t have the confidence and support to face? One MUST start their own healing journey first. What we do may often trigger you so you need to know how to recognize and handle them when they happen. Once you’ve begun working on self you will be more of an asset to others. The best thing I did was connect with other survivors, volunteering for local shelters and programs. You can often be trained or certified for free by simply volunteering. You get to connect with like-minded individuals and build long-lasting relationships. There are strengths inside you, you just haven’t tapped into them. Always remember “It’s okay to not be okay, it’s not okay to stay that way”!
Ch-Hara Pearson is honors include:
ACHI Magazine Editors Choice 2017
ACHI Magazines Servant Leadership 2018
Woman of Strength 2018
Fayetteville Observer 40 Under 40 Community Leadership 2019
Institute of Community Leadership 2019 Graduate
Citizens Academy 2018 and 2019
Call: (984)-37S-CARS (377-2277)
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